Chapter One

She's forty-one and her daddy still calls 'er "baby"
All the folks 'round Brownsville say she's crazy
'cause she walks downtown with her suitcase in her hand
Lookin' for a mysterious dark-haired man
Delta Dawn
Performed by Helen Reddy
Words and Music by Alex Harvey and Larry Collins

Day 4

Cold. It was always cold here in this dreary place. The lights never went out so the day never changed to night except for the small slivers of light which came through windows near the ceiling so high above her head. Then the stars never shown through all there was was black behind thick swirled glass.  The people who came in and out never gave her a blanket or a pillow they never even gave her something warm to wear. She’d tried to ask several times but the only thing that came out were garbled guttural sounds followed by a long stream of tears.

Usually after that some big man dressed in white showed up with a needle. No matter how she fought to be away from it or protested that she didn’t want it he’d jab her with it anyway. Soon she was sleeping. Not really sleeping more she’d been turned to ‘stand by’ for a while. Sort of awake but not functioning like the other drug in the other needles it made her docile and they seemed to like that. 

A few times the man who came rushing into the ‘safety room’ with the tell-tale-gray padding had been big and black with a graying beard and a deep chuckle. He called himself something she couldn’t remember but she thought it might be ‘Wylie’.

Once or twice over the last however many days Wylie had taken her out of this rather dreary room and they walked through the hallways which were just as dreary and which smelled bad-a combination of urine and despair- to a place where there were big windows and she could see the outside. 

In this place Wylie wanted to talk and to that end and to show that he trusted her Wylie took the restraints off her hands. Calla looked down to see the skin was red and chaffed she rubbed each wrist in turn and as Wylie talked she tried to follow along. Nothing made any sense and the more he talked the more she tried to comprehend and to be good but she didn’t understand the questions and her throat wouldn’t work. The more she tried to answer and the more she cried the more upset she became. It wasn’t as though she even knew what she wanted to say or how to say it so it would appear but only that she wanted to say something and could not. “Do you want Daniel to come and visit you?” Wylie asked and was pleased to see that the sound of her Husband’s name caught her attention as Calla stopped fidgeting with her wrists and looked up at him. “Do you understand me, Calla? Daniel is going to come visit with you. Is that all right with you?” So far nothing gained her full attention and she’d yet to utter a single coherent word though thankfully she did stop screaming but even that took a while. He sedated her for the ambulance ride to the clinic but she did not fall asleep instead she lie on the gurney her eyes wide and frightened while they barreled down the country roads. The whole time she whimpered as loudly as she could until Willie couldn’t take it any longer and he let her have another shot.  After that she went to sleep but the second she woke the next morning she was right back to screaming at the top of her lungs. She didn’t scream words or shout out nasty things Calla just simply screamed while standing right in front of the door and doing everything she could to get those gloved and restrained hands to her face.  It drove everyone crazy and made the small hairs on the backs of their necks and arms stand straight up. Something about just seemed a pierce right through you starting at the top of your head and splitting off at the legs to stream out the soles of both feet and into the ground.  Now she was looking at him and she was quiet. Two good signs that she might be coming around. “Calla?”

Daniel.

The name made her feel warm and happy, loved and wanted just before she could smile the lovely thoughts and images conjuring themselves up in her mind  gave way to something else, something that she didn’t like.  Her brow furrowed and she bit on her thumbnail.

“Don’t do that, Calla.” Wylie told her and put his hand over hers taking her thumb away. “Answer me; do you want to see Daniel?”

Daniel? Who is that? She looked up at Wylie again. Who are you? Who am I? Why am I here? Where is here?

Today was Calla’s last day of full lock down, the first day her family would be allowed to come and visit with her and Willie had been hoping for a better reception to the news that her Husband was coming. So far nothing really seemed to bring her around or came close to hauling her out of the psychosis she was falling deeper and deeper in to.  “Well, he’ll be along this afternoon so you’ve plenty of time to get ready for your little visit.” He encouraged.  Daniel hadn’t been very cooperative but Willie understood that. It was difficult for family members and loved ones of a person with a diseased mind to watch that person slip further and further away.  After all, asylums and sanatoriums had been built for REASONS, hadn’t they? Of course they had. Not all of those reasons were selfless. Even in this age of enlightenment having someone like Calla in the family was an embarrassment.

Dr. Jackson had been through a lot with and for this woman Dr. Willie could certainly understand if the good Dr. Jackson felt let down, drained or simply wanted to distance himself from his crazy wife.  All of which seemed to be true. Dr. Jackson’s unwillingness or inability to be here for her would serve them all well in the end or at least Willie was hoping so anyway. “Well, we’re all done with our little game for today. We’ll see if we can’t get you cleaned up a little bit before he gets here. Get those dirty clothes off of you toss you into a hot shower and give you a scrub. It would do you good.” Out of the side of his mouth he added; “You stink.” Willie started typing on his laptop he always made notes while In Session and didn’t think anything of it.

Calla looked down at the flimsy pair of pajamas she’d been wearing for…well, she didn’t know how long. She was vaguely aware of the fact that they were stained and, yes, perhaps they didn’t smell very good. Then again, the people here weren’t very nice.

Are they?

No they are NOT.

From what her fractured mind could piece together it had been some time ago that she stopped screaming though she didn’t know how long. Time had lost its sense and its meaning. She did know that she’d stopped because the people here didn’t like it and they didn’t understand that no matter how hard she tried to stop she just couldn’t. They’d yell at her, shake her, threaten her with their angry voices and gnarled faces until finally one of them would prick her with the needle, which only made her scream louder until the drug took over and then she just lay there on the floor docile as a kitten. 

Then at some point her throat became too raw to scream any longer and now it hurt just to swallow. Talking was out of the question on more levels than one. Every now and then a thought which might be considered coherent came to mind but then it went off on its merry way long before she could force her throat to work and then she couldn’t find the words.  Part of her mind knew what the words were, of course she did! She knew the words, how they sounded, what they meant what she’d forgotten was how to say them. She’d try writing but they never let her hands go, no they were always attached to the belt at her waist by two short leather straps which made writing out of the question.

Since she stopped screaming she’d tried and tried to tell them when she had to go to the bathroom. She knocked on the door and jumped up to the ‘viewing window’, she did a little pee-pee dance in front of the camera in the room trying to attract someone’s attention. But no one cared. Just because she’d lost her mind didn’t mean she didn’t know when she had to pee!

No matter what she did it was all no good they never got there on time. When she did mess herself, which always left her horribly embarrassed, they didn’t do a good job cleaning her up which left her smelling badly. If they’d just let her hands go! She could do it herself. Instead they’d rip off the bottoms and use a cold wet rag which looked as though someone had been scrubbing floors with it and they’d rub it rudely between her legs. Some of them laughed not just because she was ‘stupid’ (that’s what they said! That she was stupid!) and that she couldn’t control herself but she didn’t have any hair where she should. Sometimes they’d point to the bare patch between her legs and they’d get a great big kick out of it.  Sometimes, after ward, they wouldn’t give her another pair of bottoms they just made her sit there in her crummy little room with her hands bound to her sides and just a little pajama top for warmth and modesty.  Not even a blanket for cover.

 The one time that she’d moved her bowels and they didn’t come they just let her sit in it until morning. After that Calla stopped eating and she tried not to drink very much either. Under the circumstances, wouldn’t you? Eating wasn’t a pleasure to begin with. They never let her hands go so that she could feed herself . When they tried to feed her they always mashed her lips with the fork tines—and my how it hurt! They never apologized either they just kept sticking her lips with the tines demanding she open her mouth. Now her lips were bruised and sore.

 Besides, it wasn’t like the food was any good so if she gave it up then her lips felt better and she didn’t get yelled at so much and, best of all, she didn’t mess herself.  Worst of all, they put a diaper on her so they wouldn’t have to be bothered by her.  She hated it. When it was dry it was all right but still even then it was humiliating. Then they’d let it get wet and wetter and sometimes wetter still until it bunched up between her legs in a cold soggy clump which turned to a stiff gel.

Try as she did—and day after endless day she did TRY!-- she just couldn’t seem to remember what she’d done that was so horribly wrong she should be punished this way.

Abandoned in this place without him.

By him.

Dr. Willie closed his laptop and turned to her noticing that the sudden sharp sound of the top clicking shut made her jump. “Come on, Calla, we’ll get you that scrub.”

With a filthy rag no doubt!

They’ll laugh!

Let those nasty people with their clumsy hands and their horrible words have at me?

Let they laugh at me?

Points and Sneers they will!

“Calla?” Willie said and held his hand out to her.  There was something in those distant eyes that frightened him. Something he’d seen a million times but never in the emerald eyes of what the world now knew as Mutants. She was going to….

Bolt.

Calla was off the couch and running around the room. Her arms crossed over her body as though she were hugging herself and then she began screaming. After that, well, after that everything was a blur as it all happened so goddamn fast!

“Calla!” Willie tried to catch her but she slipped past him. “Dr Strong! Dr. Strong!” Willie shouted into the intercom on his desk calling for the men and women in white to come and help him. “Don’t…no….Calla!” Willie tried to get himself under control as he watched Calla climb the seven-shelf bookcase in his office.  The door behind him burst open and three orderlies and a nurse came barreling through. “Steady, Calla.” Willie said uneasily as she stood up. “Take it easy you don’t want to fall from there.” He most certainly did not want her falling from there. The building was old and as such it had high ceilings the bookcase—a heavy mahogany number—was taller than Willie and as such it did not fit in his library at home so he had it brought here.

In front of her was a sea of faces none of which she recognized. They were yelling and shouting and reaching up trying to grab her and all Calla could do was press herself further and further into the corner and standing higher and higher on her tippy toes trying to be away from them. Why did they want to hurt her anyway? She hadn’t done anything…..she was trying! Couldn’t they see she was trying?! TRYING TO BE GOOD! She just didn’t want them to take her clothes off anymore! The sea of swirling faces and outstretched hands would not stop crashing in toward her.  They were trying to get her down off some high place that she didn’t know how she’d gotten up there and now looking down from the height was making her nervous as it gave her that warped sense we call Vertigo. Calla didn’t know which was worse the spinning ground calling to her or those hands and arms reaching to snatch her away.

Suddenly the thing she was standing on began to wobble and then to sway. The people below her stopped shouting and began speaking in calm voices although their words were still the same as before. But they did not stop reaching up and out for her which was the one thing that was making her most nervous. Pressed as hard and tight against the wall as physically possible and up, up, up on those now aching tip-toes the swaying became a rocking and…..

CRASH….

The bookcase did not just fall, it imploded. The top on which she had been standing let go just as the thing toppled over and all the shelves dropped down on top of each other as the thing went crashing onto its side.  Calla tumbled, cart wheeled in the air and then finally landed in a heap of books and two dying plants.  Before she knew it or could even attempt to do anything about it there were--what felt like dozens!--of hands grabbing and grasping at her while they harshly held her down. Then there was the familiar sting of the needle. She tried to tell them no, she tried to BEG them not to stick her with the needle again.

Didn’t they know she shouldn’t have needles?

She was pregnant!

She was junkie!

Too late. They didn’t care. Wylie had the needle in his hand and was uncapping it in his teeth while they held her firmly on the floor. Tears streamed down her face as Calla shook her head with its brutally short auburn hair. Not for a second did she stop squirming or trying to get away. It wasn’t until the sedative took over and she had no other choice but to go limp in the arms of the staff of the Norwich Clinic did she give up the fight.

Willie got up and tossed the needle in a nearby sharps container. “Someone call Dr. Jackson, I want to get him up here stat.” He looked directly at two of the orderlies. “Get her back to her room.”  To the third he said; “Clean this mess up.” Before Dr. Willie could leave his office or catch his breath the phone on his desk began to ring he waited for the men to pick her up and carry her through the door before answering it.  Nicholas Jackson was here to see his Mother.  “Stall him a minute or two.” Willie said. “Then send him up with an escort.” Looking at the orderly who’d stayed behind Willie said; “Do a good job I want this office pristine.”

“Yes, Dr. Willie.” The orderly returned and quickly went to fetch a vacuum and someone from housekeeping leaving Willie alone in his office.

The Son. That was interesting. Certainly he’d want to see his Mother. Willie picked up the phone and punched the buttons for the 9^th floor station. “When she gets there I want Calla Jackson cleaned up well she’s having company sooner than we expected.”

Willie had been busting his ass to get Daniel up here the last four days. No, Daniel couldn’t visit Calla it was standard policy in matters such as this that the patient could not have any contact with the outside world including family and close friends.  It helped to them to sort of detox from the world so they could get their heads in a better place.  That didn’t mean Dr. Jackson didn’t have an obligation to his Wife and that he didn’t have to come up here and consult with the doctors and staff. Willie treated Daniel and helped him through that little rough patch not too long ago he thought he had a decent handle on Daniel’s psyche and where his relationship with Calla stood.  Then it was surprising when Daniel made himself unavailable but soon it was welcome surprise.  There were certain members of the military, the government and possibly even a civilian organization or two whom felt it best if Calla Jackson stayed locked up for the foreseeable future. In fact, they didn’t just want her in the lock down ward of the local crazy house they wanted her shipped away from her family and friends…far away.  They were willing to go to great lengths and pay offensive sums of money to attain this goal.

The longer Daniel was unreachable and not seen the easier it would be to make that happen.  “What does the boy want?”  On one of the few occasions Daniel had been available by telephone he had alluded to the idea that Nicholas might have done something to his Mother.  Daniel very calmly told Willie that there was a stretch of time Calla could not remember but that he knew Nicholas, Ares, Achilles and the women of Ares’ Island were the only people with her. The tone of Daniel’s voice and the words he chose lead Willie to believe that something of an improper and possibly even sexual nature may have occurred between Mother and Son or, maybe, between Father and Daughter.

 Ares was gone. Achilles was incognito as were the women.  For all intents and purposes Calla was also gone. Only Nicholas might be able to say with any certainty what those events were. What had been so bad that it caused her to forget?  Well, that wasn’t exactly it now was it? No. Dr. Adams’ notes and lab reports did indicate that there was a massive dose of Rohypnol in her system when she came back from that island. Other than making a woman docile the drug tended to screw with immediate memory. In many cases they couldn’t remember six or more hours leading up to when they were given the drug. So did someone give it to her to make compliant or to make her forget? Possibly someone gave it to her to make her forget that she’d been compliant?  

Other than being given that interesting tid-bit of information, Dr. Willie managed to tell Daniel that he thought it best if Calla underwent a termination procedure. He tried to make Daniel understand that a better wider variety of drugs would be available to her if they didn’t have the fetus to concern themselves with.  Given the fact that Calla would only carry for six months the clock was ticking! True it was possible to abort the pregnancy at any stage—there were no laws governing Mutant pregnancies now were there? Of course not! Still it would be best to get this out of the way as soon as possible.  He’d hoped and pushed and prodded for an answer but he didn’t receive one. This afternoon he’d try again.

Willie got up and went left his office, Nicholas would be up here soon, it was best to let the boy sweat it out a bit here in the shrink’s room. About forty-five minutes later he returned to find Nicholas jittery and fidgeting with his long hair. A good sign.  “Nicholas, it’s good to finally meet you.” The small round man said holding out his hand and Nick shook it.  “I understand that you want to see your Mother.”

“I didn’t know I was s’posed ta clear it with you first.  Sorry about that.” Nicholas said quickly.  “I just wanna see her for a few minutes. She ok? How’s she doin’?”

“Sit down,” Willie invited as he took his a seat at his desk.  “Your Mother is doing as well as can be hoped for, she’s getting the finest care possible, I assure you.” Looking around the room he saw it had been adequately cleaned up and at this point there was no reason to get the very big boy riled up so he refrained from relaying the events of Calla’s book-case scaling to her Son.

No, if she were home she’d get the finest care possible, Nicholas thought but did not say.  “Please, I just want to see her.”

“Why is it so important that you see her today, Nicholas?”

What a stupid fucking question! This guy was supposed to help people with their problems? Jesus H. Christ, the guy couldn’t get his head around this simple concept. “She’s my Mom.” Was all he said when the look on Willie’s face said that was an unsatisfactory answer in disbelief and growing frustration he added, “I love her, I want to make sure she’s all right and let her know I’m here.”

Dr. Willie nodded his graying head and made a little agreeable grunting sound. This was a cheap but effective tool which bought a few seconds thinking time.  “I have to ask you something, Nicholas. Your Father tells me that there is a period of time your Mother can’t remember. Are you aware of this?”

Nick licked his lips as his throat went dry.  “Yeah.”

“Do you know what happened during that time period?”  Willie waited for an answer when he didn’t get one he prodded Nicholas. “It might be helpful to your Mother’s recovery.”

“I don’t see how.” He croaked. “Are you gonna let me see her or not?”

“No, I’m not.” Willie said directly. “I can’t let you in there if seeing you will upset her, I’m her doctor as such I am charged with watching out for her health and helping her recover.”

“You think that’s not what I want?”  Nicholas charged.

“I didn’t say that.” Dr. Willie reminded him. “If what you know will help your Mother then perhaps you should tell me what it is.  You do want to help your Mother, don’t you Nicholas? That is why you’re here, isn’t it?”

Sure it was.

Soon Nicholas was spilling his guts. He wasn’t even making the attempt to stop or to hold back on the nasty details. It had been killing him just spewing hot bursts of acid to dissolve his insides and then eating him up little by little like some fucked up fly that puked on what it ate.

“So that’s it.” Nick said and finally came away from the window where he’d been staring out into nothingness while telling his tale.

“That’s what?” Willie asked.  “Can you say it, Nick?”

It took him a few seconds but he’d so wanted to say to get it out! Saying it to the wall or the pillow or the free weights didn’t seem to count so he hadn’t bothered giving it voice until now.  “I raped my Mother.”  He covered his mouth with his hand almost as if to stop the words before they could escape but it was too late so he said it again, “I raped my Mother.  I’m so sorry. I’m so so sorry.”

Willie believed Nicholas in fact from where he sat he even felt the young man’s remorse.  “But?”

Nick shook his head, dark ringlets bounced around his sad brooding face. “It’s so selfish,” he muttered.

“What is?”

“Well, it’s just that, see…if, like…if she never remembers…..then, I can never tell her how sorry I am.  I can’t make up for it.” He shook his head again. “Not that I ever could. But I want to try.” Nick added quickly.  “Can I see her now?” He laughed a little. “Yeah, after all that, gee, doc, can I see her now?”  Plopping down on the couch Nicholas finally broke down and cried over it all. “I love her, you gotta believe that I’d never do that to her…I don’t know….I don’t know…” He stopped talking and cried harder. “Please can I see her?”

There was a camera in the room and while Nicholas was one massive man some Thorazine and four or five orderlies would contain him. It might even be good for Calla who, by all accounts, deeply loved her children. “Sure. Come with me.”

Huge heart thudding in his chest Nicholas followed Dr. Willie out of the office and to the big double doors of the lock-down ward where they had to go through a security check before being buzzed inside.  Down the second corridor and on each side of them were various locked rooms from which various sounds of distress and rage were heard. Every now and then someone threw themselves against the door to their room causing a big thud and more commotion among the patients.  This floor smelled worse than the first floor the stench of urine and feces and general decay overpowered the smell of disinfectant here.  Suddenly Nicholas was afraid of what he was going to see.

“This one,” Dr. Willie stopped in front of a door that looked like all of the other doors. “Your Mother’s in here.”  Looking through the window Willie was upset to see that his orders had not been followed and that Calla was still sitting in the same filthy pajamas. He’d have a talk with the staff over that one.

While Willie had to stand on his tip-toes to look in the observation window Nicholas had to bend down to do the very same thing.  Nicholas hadn’t seen his Mother in 5 days and he was very taken aback by what he saw.  The small woman huddling in the far corner in a pair of white pajamas which stained with her own urine, her once long lush auburn hair had been mercilessly butchered off at the ears.  Small fluffy white gloves strapped over her hands which were restrained to her side by a wide leather belt and the lines running down her face, it took him a moment to understand they were gouges from her own finger nails.  “Can I go in?” He said with a heavy heart.

“Think you can handle it?”

“Yeah.”

“Open her up.” Willie shouted to the nurses down the hall who manned the central station on the lock-down ward. They were behind bullet proof glass from that safe vantage point they could see everything on their color monitors.

BUZZ

With those pearls of wisdom in rolling around in his mind Nick ducked down and walked into the padded room where they were keeping his Mother.  The door shut firmly behind him.  “Mom?” He asked tentatively taking a few steps toward her on the soft padded floor and wishing he’d taken his shoes off he was leaving dirty footprints behind and from the looks of it she had to sleep on them.  The air in here was worse than the air in the hall it reeked of urine and sweat. “Mom? Can ya hear me?”  Half expecting her to start screaming at the sight of him he squatted down in front of her. “Can ya even see me? Momma?”

The voice sounded kind but more than that, for reasons she couldn’t understand, it sounded familiar. Calla raised her eyes to gaze upon the owner. I know that face. I do. I know…. She was tired now from the needle and her book-case-climbing adventure it was hard to focus. Calla let out a little snort which made the man look at her queerly. Focus…yeah…right.

“Hi, Momma. Do you know who I am?”  He reached out his hand but she backed away. Nick didn’t blame her any he’d run away from him too if he could. “I’m not gonna hurt you.  Look, I brought ya something.”  Looking back at the window which was empty and at the camera which was at a bad angle and probably couldn’t see what he was doing, he put his hand in his pocket and came out with  a handful of small sweet treats. “See? Look what I’ve got.”  She looked awful. The marks on her face left by her raking finger nails were not healing well. They were welted and red they even looked as though they could be infected. Didn’t anyone clean them? Didn’t they even put antibiotics on them? Her lips were purple. Why are they purple? He looked closer at her and realized they were purpled because they were bruised. Maybe she wouldn’t want what he had brought for her but then again when did Mom ever turn down…..

Chocolate.

In Nicholas’ large hand appeared several Hershey Kisses. Calla stared at the pretty color foil and licked her sore lips.

It’s a trick!
It’s poisoned!
As soon as we reach for it he’ll GRAB US!

So many voices in her head and they never were silent! Sometimes they agreed but most of the time they just bickered and argued with each other.

In the end her stomach won out over the voices in her head and looking up at the familiar man kneeling beside her she opened her mouth to receive the bit of candy. At least there were no forks involved.  In the quiet padded room her budding stomach let out a little growl. 

Nicholas unwrapped one of the Hershey Kisses and he tried to put the chocolate between her lips but she wasn’t holding them far enough apart.  Nick bit it in half and gave her one, it slipped easily into her mouth and as it melted a little line of brown drool dripped from the corner of her mouth and he wiped away with his thumb.

The chocolate was grand! It tasted so good!  Gleefully sucking on the chocolate in her mouth Calla smiled at him a sad little grin that almost lit up her tired and tearing bloodshot eyes.  Swallowing the candy she opened up again for the other half which he gave her. 

“I love you, Momma. I’m sorry, do you know that? I am so sorry, Momma.” Part wished she did but the other half was just as elated when he realized she didn’t understand what he was apologizing for.

Outside the room the loud speakers went off;

“Paging Dr. Strong, Dr. Strong Code Blue, Dr. Strong to Room 213 Stat.”

Beneath that was a cacophony of people running and yelling and the overriding sound of some man screaming. Nick got up and looked out through the observation window to see a naked man running around the corridor evading ‘Dr. Strong’ and his Code Blue Staff while the insane man flung handfuls of his feces around with great delight.  Looking back at her he got his first really good look at his Mother.  Up to this point he’d just been too numb to notice very much.

In the din his Mother had scooted off to the farthest corner of the room crab-like with her feet in front of her and her bound hands at her sides. She pressed against the wall so hard the padding indented and Nick thought it heard it give a little cry.  There she was under the camera and out of its view as well as being out of the view of the window. Sitting on the floor with her legs partly open he saw that there was a big yellow stain on the once-white pajama bottoms.  Not only that, there was an unsightly bulge there as well. Is that a diaper??? Have they got my Mother wearing a fucking diaper?

 On the top of said pajamas, covering the place where her pretty pink nipples had once been, were smears of dried blood over which were more droplets of dried blood from the self-inflicted wounds on her face.  They were healing but not swiftly and they were deep and they made long welts from her forehead to her jaw in six perfect stripes accompanied by two more which criss-crossed over the bridge of her nose. Nick wished he could heal her but that was Cole’s department.

Still sitting on the floor—not that she had any place else to go—another line of chocolate drool began dripping down the side of her mouth calling his attention once more and just begging for inspection. Nick knelt down again and brushed away the chocolatey line of drool. The small pin prick sized marks around her mouth and on her lips caught his eye. “What happened to you? They’re not treating you good?”  Outside the door the crazy man in the hall was screaming and crying. Before Nick knew it…..

…SPLAT…….SPLAT…..SPLAT…

Chunks of shit hit the viewing window. She turned away from him and pushed her face in to the ratted padding.

 “He do that a lot?” Nick asked not expecting an answer.  Suddenly the door knob was turning and she was shaking so badly that she was making the wall shake. Whoever was on the other side of the door was yanking and pulling and then kicking and growling as they tugged and pulled and yanked and turned the knob.  Nick got up when his face appeared in the viewing window he got his first look at Mr. Shitflinger whom he would later find out was pronounced criminally insane and found guilty of raping and mutilating several young women.  Mr. Shitflinger was a naked, short, bald, round white man who looked the head janitor at Any School, USA. His hands were covered with shit and he was doing everything he could to get into her room.  The sight of Nicholas caused Mr. Shitflinger to back off. He pissed a puddle of warm yellow urine as he went.  If Nicholas wasn’t mistaken it was only now that the staff were really starting to move and take care of the problem. He could be wrong about that. In any even the annoying man was hauled away by Dr. Strong and housekeeping arrived shortly thereafter to clean up the mess he’d left behind.

 Turning back to look at her Nick found Calla huddled in the corner and rocking back and forth in a meager attempt to cover herself she looked at him through pain filled eyes “This room stinks.” He grumbled.  “This whole thing stinks.  I gotta get you outta here this is no place for you.”  Nick knelt down next to her again and she opened her mouth. “One more, I got something else for you.”  Reaching in his pocket he repeated the same pattern of opening the red foil, biting the chocolate in half and putting it in her mouth and ultimately wiping away two more lines of chocolate from her chin. “Look what I found.”  In his big hand appeared a very old rag doll.  “This is yours, isn’t it?”

Calla let out a little whimper and reached for the doll with restrained gloved hands that didn’t meet.   Nicholas realized she wasn’t going to be able to hold it the way he’d intended and hoped that it might bring her some comfort.  He put the soft body doll into one reaching hand and watched it close tightly. She brought the doll to her stomach which was as far as she could get her hands to go, Nick found himself wondering how she ate with her hands restrained? Didn’t they let her hands go so that she could eat?  The way she was sucking down the Hershey Kisses he was beginning to think that maybe they didn’t.

The doll was a welcomed sight and she recognized it instantly!  Calla wanted to hold it in her hands and squeeze it tight to her body but she couldn’t. Those gloved and bound hands didn’t stop her from cuddling it as closely as possible.  Suddenly she knew who the man in the room was!

Of course I know him! Who else would have this? He said he would come back!
He’s a liar!
Shut up!
He’s a fucking liar and a cheat!
No, he loves me now shut up!

“Baby.” She mumbled taking the soft body doll in her teeth and then folding it under her chin.

“What?  What did you say, Momma?” As far as he knew that one simple word was the only one she’d uttered since they took her away from the Gate Room. Nick settled on the floor next to her for the last time that day propping himself up against the wall. Calla scrambled over to him and lay down at his side with her head on his chest. He took the doll out from under her chin, freed one hand from the lousy restraining belt and placed it inside.

 “Baby,” Calla said once more and closed her eyes.

“Sleep, Momma.”  Nicholas wrapped his big arms around his Mother and stroked her butchered hair.  “I’m gonna bring Cole up here and she’s gonna heal you and fix your hair.”  Under his hand he realized how greasy it was and how much dander and dirt he could feel on her scalp.  Don’t they even let you shower?  If she had any idea how badly she smelled and looked, she’d pitch a royal fit.  “This is no place for you. They don’t understand. They can’t help you. Gonna get you outta here, Momma, don’t worry, gonna get you outta here.”

For the first time since she came to live in this smelly place Calla closed her eyes on her own and went to sleep believing herself safe and warm curled up at the side of her Father.

Two hours later she woke up alone.

Calla started screaming once more.

End Chapter One Of Faded Rose
By Moon Mistress
Continue to
Chapter Two