Chapter Three

As I returned across the fields I'd known
I recognized the walls that I once made
I had to stop in my tracks for fear
Of walking on the mines I'd laid
And if I built this fortress around your heart
Encircled you in trenches and barbed wire
Then let me build a bridge
For I cannot fill the chasm
And let me set the battlements on fire
Fortress Around Your Heart
Sting

It was well past three in the morning when the party ended. Zeus opened the rest of his Palace to his guests who were too drunk, spent and full to find their way to the door anyway.   The God of Gods had a special room for the new couple.  Leading them away from the main living areas of his home he took them to a room where they could not be disturbed. Opening the door which to Callestah appeared made of ivory and was carved with winged people they entered a round room.  Callestah gasped as she took it in.

Like Aphrodite’s temple this room was made of pink marble floor to ceiling.  There was a very large bed by which an open fire burned and every inch around them was filled with fresh flowers the scent of which was almost as heavenly to her as Ares’ was. Around them burned candles and oil lamps bathing the room in a soft even light.   Past the fire and the big comfortable bed was an open-air balcony. The sheer curtains there fluttered in the early morning breeze bringing in the tinge of salt water and sparkle of night. “It’s beautiful, like a fairy tale.” She muttered leaving Ares’ side to wander around the enchanted room.  By the big soft waiting bed was a silver bucket and it held a large carafe of Nectar.

Zeus dropped the room key into Ares waiting hand but he didn’t stop staring at his Granddaughter.  He let out a little giggle as he turned and then patted his Son on the shoulder. “Behave yourself.”  He let out another titter and then let himself out of the room. Ares locked it behind him when he turned around Callestah was no longer wandering the room but sitting on the big overstuffed bed and she seemed to be waiting for him.

Behave yourself.

It would be easy to disregard that advice but he would not.  On the bed she opened her arms to him but then she dropped them to her sides. “Perhaps you prefer I find something else?” She remembered how Calla loved to dress for Daniel before they made love and the skimpy little nightgowns or teddies—that’s what she called them, teddies—she would put on. Sometimes she would bathe in scented water and then cover her skin with a lotion of the same scent before dressing in one of her sexy outfits and then making love to him. Perhaps Ares would like this though she didn’t know if such a nightgown awaited her anywhere in this room.

Ares’ heart stopped and so did his body. She looked like an angel a shy and delicate angel meant only for his arms and his delight as she sat there so unsure of what was to come but awaiting with much anticipation anyway.  “I want you just as you are. I can’t wait to take that dress from you.”  He began his stride once more and this time he didn’t stop until he reached her at which time he dropped to his knees in front of her. For the first time in Forever she was higher than he and Ares had to look up at her as he took her hand.  “Are you all right, my love?”

“Yes.”

Ares did not quite believe her there was much hesitation in her voice. “Drink with me?” Rising to his feet once more he poured two glasses of Ouzo and then returned to the bed where he kicked off his shoes and then laid down. “Come lay with me.”  Her gown rustled as made her way to him on her knees holding it up with one hand on each side of her little body.

 Behave yourself.

 Yes, yes, behave.  She’s so damn small. Why is she so tiny? What if I break her without meaning….

Callestah’s small warm hand closed down over his as she took the glass he was offering and then laid down next to him. “I love you.  Nothing will stand in our way now. You are my Husband and I am your Wife, we will have a Family….” She raised the glass to him, “We will have Forever.”

“All this and more.” Ares agreed the smile she gave him faltered and his doubts returned. “Are you afraid to be here with me? Don’t lie.” He coaxed.  “Our lovemaking will not be like last summer, I swear this, I will never….”

“She made you wait too long, I know.” Callestah said her words very calmly and very much as though she was doing nothing more than stating an obvious fact. “I am sorry for that…”

“You’re sorry? Why?” Ares watched her finish the Nectar in her glass and then settle it on the table next to the bed then she scooted next to him to lay her head on his chest. When the warmth and weight of her head met the heat of his own skin Ares’ eyes closed being so close to her was divine. He never wanted to lose her and if somehow he could freeze this night and live right here throughout the next 10,000 years then that was exactly what he would do. 

“I just am.” Callestah whispered.

Before Ares knew it she was unbuttoning the remaining studs on his shirt and then splaying it open. Sitting next to him on her knees Callestah returned her head to the place over his heart. Calla so loved to lie this with way with Jackson and now Callestah understood why. Beneath that thick mat of hair and those hard rippling muscles the beating of Ares’ heart was the most soothing music she’d ever heard.  Daniel was Calla’s home but Ares was hers those two points could not be justified until the two women were made separate and then whole again by the men who shared their beds.

“You’re trembling.” Ares said in a low voice as he wrapped those huge arms around her little body. 

Like Ares she knew there was little sense in lying to him now that they were bound.  He would see through her just as easily as she saw through him. “I know I shouldn’t be. I know you love me but….”

“I am so much bigger than you.” He finished as her voice trailed up. Ares picked up the hand that was covering his heart so warmly and kissed the finger tips there.  “I wish I could tell you that this will not hurt but there will be some pain.  I will do my best to make sure it as slight as possible and that the thing you remember most about this night in years to come is how good it was and how loved you felt.”

Callestah smiled sadly and tried to take comfort in his words but that wasn’t what she was afraid of.  No, there was something else which bothered her.  Why couldn’t she stop seeing Eros? Or rather Eros as Ares? Why wouldn’t the ugly images go away? Eros was long dead and she knew it had been him, in the more rational side of her mind she knew that, yes of course she did.

Still…. 

It just didn’t seem to help no matter how much she tried to force her way forward feeling once they got over this hurdle everything would be all right.

It would, wouldn’t it?

Yet this fear, this inability to separate Ares from Eros in her head was the main reason Callestah had not come out when Calla wanted her to last summer. At first Calla did not call upon Callestah as she thought it was her duty to lay in Ares’ bed because it was Daniels’ life which hung in the balance. She thought herself strong enough and he kind enough not to harm her but she did not realize that patience had never been one of his strong points. Calla suffered through flashes of Eros disguised as Ares but it had not been Calla on that beach so long ago. It had been Callestah. As she’d told her new husband earlier in the day; although she and Calla knew everything that the other did their experiences were different. 

To this day Callestah felt horrible about it! It was the one time in their collective lives that Calla called to her asking for her help and Callestah denied it to her.  After everything Calla had shielded her from it seemed terribly unfair. The first night Calla spent with Jackson and his brother Callestah saw her chance to redeem herself because Calla was going to refuse them until either Jackson forced her in to (which she’d never forgive him for) or she died whichever came first.  In that weakened physical and emotionally drained state it was easy for Callestah to emerge as the dominate personality at least for that one night and ensure their survival. 

“What is it?” Ares asked.  More than just his sheer size she was thinking of something else. It danced to a wicked little dirge in her mind and he could almost see it…almost. “Whatever it is you can tell me.” He encouraged tilting her face upward to look at him. “If you’re not ready for this…”

“It is our wedding night, my Lord, if I am not ready now when will I be?”

“Tomorrow night, the night after, it matters not. You are my Wife and I love you we will wait if it was what you want, what you need.” One hand under her chin he ran the other across her hair.  It was still piled high upon her head, Ares sat up, she with him, so that he could very lovingly pull the pins from it. Silken fire fell from her head and cascaded down around her shoulders the golden highlights shimmered in the firelight. “We have all the Time in the world, my darling. There is no need to rush this.” He tried to remember that technically she was only a few days old.  “This all happened very swiftly, I know….”

“Why didn’t you cure her?”

“What?”

“Calla when she lay dying in the hospital all you could do was insist that Jackson go after…” she stammered and then pointed inward, “me.  I was in here if you let her die then I would be gone too.”

Ares stopped stroking her hair. Callestah wasn’t just trembling now she was shaking and there were tears welling up in those emerald eyes. “I thought you in the Underworld.” He tried to explain.  “Were you not there?”

“I told you…..at the top of my very lungs, I screamed at you in Calla’s kitchen that I was in HER not in the Underworld, why didn’t you listen? Why didn’t you believe me?”

“Jackson said….”

“Don’t you know Mother never wanted me? Not ME!” She cried.  “The girl she took that night was the part of me that still existed….the part BEFORE Eros. She didn’t want anything to do with ME!  Neither did you it seems.”

There it was all of it was bubbling and churning and festering just below the surface ready to explode all over anyone standing in the way.  “Of course I want you.”

“No you don’t! You’re just settling for me! You want the same one; the one who is unspoiled, untainted…untouched!  Not me. That’s why you sent Daniel and David to the Underworld to retrieve a girl who would not be angry with you and you would not have to deal with….” Callestah stopped short.

“With what? Spit it out.” Ares demanded.

“WITH ME! And what Eros did and what Kanan and what you did….” She stopped abruptly and covered her mouth with both hands.

Although he didn’t mean it Ares let out a low guttural growl. “Don’t stop there,” he said in a dark voice, “come on out with it all of it.  Don’t let this poison fester between us any longer. Calla was never brave enough to confront me here, are you?”

Yes she was.  “Tell me it wasn’t you. Look me in the eye and tell me and I will believe you.”  She stopped again and the tears began to roll down her cheeks Callestah pushed onward. “I want to stop seeing your angry knotted face over me. I want to stop feeling like a frightened little girl! Tell me you don’t really believe those things you….he…you…said!”

What Eros said. Well…. “What did my Son say to you?”

“That it was his…your…right to have me first!”

Ares stroked the beard at his chin and tried to think of a way to lie to her and came up with none which were satisfactory. “Ancient laws they don’t apply…..”

“You do believe it! That’s what this is to you? Tonight just you finally having your way? Your first shot?” She pulled away from Ares and then turned her back to him.

Yes he did, of course he did deep at his core. Ancient ways died hard deaths and it wasn’t every day a new Olympian female came along. To say such things to her would be madness she’d never forget it and it would always stand between them as a bone of contention. “Stop it Callestah! You’re acting like a spoiled brat!”  He instantly regretted it when she bolted from the bed and crossed the room to the open doorway and the night beyond. Snarling and trying to regain his composure Ares followed her to the balcony high above the ocean.  “What is it that you think? Tell me. That I married you for….for what….revenge? So that I could be the first and only man to have you?”

“We are bound.” She complained wrapping her arms around her upper body to keep the nights’ chill at bay.  “So this is what you will be, is it not?”

“I could do that without marrying you. I could just let you die when I’m done with you.”

His shadow like his very presence loomed over her making the air heavy still she’d waited so long and there was much to say. There was much dirt to dig through before they went any farther.  “Yes, but you won’t be done until I bear you many many children. Is that not correct?” She didn’t wait for an answer. “Of course it is.  For that you want me alive and healthy…you’ll do anything…you’ll say anything just to get them.”

So this was it, huh? The moment he’d dreaded, fine, so be it.  “Yes,” Ares agreed. “I want them.”  Then he grinned a wicked little grin and pointed at her. “So do you.”  The God of War shook his head and sucked in air over his teeth. “On this point we agree.  You are a Goddess, a Mother Goddess and you know in your heart that you should bring forth the children of a God not a lowly man of Mortal birth.  You know me but, I…ah, my Daughter, I know you and this is not the problem.” He whispered.  “You want this there is no shame in that.  If you did not you never would have stood there while Zeus held the sword to your heart. Never would have pledged your love to me. It’s all right say it, tell me; say ‘I want it’.”  He teased as he wheeled her around to look at him.

“So what if I do?”

“Why deny yourself?” Ares countered quickly.  “What holds you back and away from me?”  Only the second time he’d asked her a question he already knew the answer to. Over the years he’d learned much from watching Jackson interact with her this seemed like a good time to deploy a few of his tactics. To that end his voice softened as once again he combed his fingers through her hair   “I want a life with you I want Eternity with you my new beautiful Wife. I love you with all that I am and all that I ever was in my younger days and all that I will ever be as I grow old.” Smiling a genuinely sad grin the God of War gracefully lowered his gigantic body to settle on his knees before her.

“Get up,” Callestah hissed stepping away from him. “Get up!”

Ares grasped her hands keeping her place and then drawing her closer to him.  “You fear me because of last summer but more than that you are angry with me, so very angry with me, aren’t you?”

“No,” she looked away from him. “Get up!”  Callestah began to pull at his hands until her were free and she tugged at him to get to his feet but Ares would not move.

“You are,” he asserted. “Now tell me and be rid of it so that we can start out life without holding anything back.”

“Get up,” she whispered one more time but he refused with the shake of his head.  “Tell me it wasn’t you.”

“It wasn’t me.” Ares said strongly still holding her hands and looking her right in the eye. “Eros is not me and I am not him. I wish I could take those memories from you. That I could make it all go away, what do the Mortals say? Make it all better…that’s it.” He smiled once more. “What can I do to make you believe me? You just say it and I’ll do it.”

Callestah looked at him eye to eye and for a moment forgot her was kneeling before her. Calla had this problem with David.  She never forgot what David did to her and she was ever mindful of the idea that he could snap and give a command performance at any moment.  But in her heart Calla believed David to be redeemed, she believed her had been justly punished and that because of it he had changed.  She was probably right but that didn’t mean it was easy to just forget. So for one night Callestah emerged and took over for the good of all involved. Now, tonight, Calla was alone with them and she was no longer Immortal, no longer a Goddess who could conjure fireballs or steel traps to protect herself from the men, one Immortal and one not, who she was facing at this very moment. Still Calla went with them; somehow she found the strength to balance one against the other and to make a leap of faith which was now staring at Callestah. 

Ares snapped last summer and she was there to witness it. It was not pretty. He had a temper that could lay waste to worlds and when Calla finally came to him she did not do it as willingly as he would have liked and she did not show the proper humility to him as her Lord. These things angered him further than his long wait for her.  Ares gave in to the wolf, the animal, in him and Calla paid the price.  The cost of Jackson’s Immortality had been high.

A few nights ago he was very gentle and affectionate not at all like last summer and certainly nothing like Eros had been.

“You were my Daughter, my Shining Star, my Little One, remember?” Ares said in a begging tone as the salt of his own tears began to sting his eyes.  “I would never do anything to hurt you.  Please say you believe me, Callestah…please.”  Yes, say you believe me and then we’ll only have one more hurdle to get past. Only one more thing to deal with. Oh please just say you believe me.

“I believe you, Father.”  She managed a smile and nod of her head. “I do. You would not do those things to me. Not so young.”

“Young or old, never. I would never force you to do anything, Callestah as I know he must have. It’s wrong, always, it’s wrong…”

“You didn’t think this with Calla last summer? You forced her to do many things for you.”

“Yes,” he agreed through gritted teeth, “I was overzealous with her…at the beginning.” He clarified. “I tried to make up for it later, and it was good…not as good as on the beach but…”

It was Callestah’s turn to growl.

“She is not you.” Ares said with a slight sneer. “That is all that matters.”

“You didn’t know that then.” She reminded him. “You my dear, Husband, you owe her much and yet you do not see that, do you? Worse yet you don’t give a damn.”

“What do I owe Calla?”

“My life.” Once more she turned her back to him. “You don’t understand.  If it were not for her I would not be here with you now. Yet you belittle her.”

This wasn’t where he thought they were going. Was he doing that? If it was true and he was mocking Calla it was only so that Callestah would not see…  “I’m sorry, she must mean a great deal to you but you must understand she’s nothing but a thorn in my side. She is the bitch who has kept me from you these last nineteen years.”

“That’s all?” She asked in an incredulous whisper. “She guarded me from the monster you left me with for twenty-five years!  Now she is gone! She could be carrying your child…right now. All she is to you is a thorn in your side? The bitch? Are you sure of this, my Lord?”

Suspicion was clear in her voice but Ares refused to give it credence. “The monster I left you with.” Ares echoed her words back to her never before thinking he’d rather talk about Kanan than Calla but he would, oh yes, he would much rather talk about Kanan than Calla Jackson.  After all this is where he thought she was leading him to begin with therefore it was best to stick with it until it met its bitter end. “You’re angry?”

Callestah couldn’t help it she burst into a fit of laughter and turned around to look at him, still down on his knees, once more.  It took her a moment to gain control of herself. “Is that a real question, my Lord? Why would I be angry over this?” She taunted. “Such a little things; my childhood, my innocence, my life. So small and so insignificant. Why would the Great and Powerful Ares care about things so fragile when he has wars to wage and justice to meter out?”  Without thinking about it she kicked at him. Her bare foot met his solid thigh and caused her much more discomfort than it did him. “Oh get up! Why don’t you just get up?!” Though her foot hurt she kicked him again and again and again. “Get up!”

On the verge of weeping Ares just stayed on his knees taking the hits she was passing out knowing that soon, any second now, she was going to break—just as Calla had done on the island.  If he could just keep it together long enough then….

“Why did you take me to him? Why did you do that to me????”  Callestah pulled her hair back with one hand, bent down and screamed in his face; “Why didn’t you come get me like you promised????”  Another kick.

 “YOU PROMISED!”

Kick!

 “ONLY A FEW DAYS!”

SLAP!

Ares’ head reeled on his shoulders as his hair flew back but he did not get up and he made no move to stop her from hitting him.  Other than his heart and his pride her blows didn’t hurt that much anyway.

“GET UP AND FACE ME LIKE A MAN!”

SMACK!

The blow rattled his teeth and drew a trickle of Ichor from his bottom lip.

“YOU SWORE! YOU PROMISED!”

SLAP SMACK KICK

Callestah’s hand fell away from her head and her hair was let loose once more to encase shoulders which were beginning to slouch. “You left me.” There was no anger in her voice now instead it was very even and very chilly.  “You let him….do that to me…you watched him…you watched him…r-r-r-rape me…then you left me with him.  I loved you.” The tears which were teetering just on the very edges of her bottom lids now swelled and spilled over. “I did everything you wanted…everything…even when I didn’t want…”

“Yes,” Ares agreed finally saying something. “You were a very good Daughter.  I did not ask you to do those things, Eros did.”

“Why did you let him? Why did you let my Brother…why didn’t you stop him!?”

“I did not. I swear this, I did not know. I thought you making up stories telling lies. If I knew what your Brother was doing I would have stopped him.”  Ichor running through his beard Ares reached out and took her shaking hand. “No one has ever been more precious to me than you. Had I known then I would have killed him for his betrayal of you. And me.”

“I thought he was you…”

“I know you did but he was not.”

She wasn’t really listening to him right now there was just so much to give voice to and be rid of Callestah was lost in that stormy sea. “You came to me on the beach,”

“Eros came to you on the beach.” Ares corrected gently but then stopped. It was time Callestah told this to someone. Perhaps Calla told Jackson over the years but Callestah had told no one and all Ares had was supposition.  “He came to you as me….” Ares lead still holding on to her hands.

“No,” she said thoughtfully, “as O’fi los. Your wolf.”  She looked down at him with eyes that seemed to have a small spark of light but perhaps he was mistaken. 

Although his taut stomach turned he coaxed her forward. “Then what, my darling? He turned into me…”

“No, O’filos licked my hand then put his snout under my dress. He sniffed me,” she said shamefully, “licked me.”  The corner of Ares’ upper lip curled and he fought to hold back the growl rising in his throat. “I was afraid I pushed you away.” He wanted to correct her once more but decided against it.  “The O’fi’los turned into you and you said that we….you took me behind the rocks, you know, on the beach below Eros’ tower. You said no one would see no one would know. I said Mother would be angry and we should not….we should not…I begged you to stop to leave me alone.”

Ares began to weep.

“You said I could scream all I wanted no one would hear and if they did they wouldn’t care if they did they wouldn’t help me. They would only come to watch and witness what was your right…You hurt me. Over and over time and again you hurt me.”  Callestah finally gazed downward into the red swollen eyes of her Father to see the sorrow and the tears there. “Why do you cry? You never cry, Father.”

“My heart hurts for you.”  With moist lips and even moister cheeks he raised her hands each in turn and kissed them. “Never would I do these things to you. Please believe me when I tell you it was Eros. He is the only one of us capable of shifting so completely.”

Eros beloved Brother and trusted Friend. Yes, Calla agreed it was Eros. Daniel agreed it was Eros and even Eros admitted it…all of it…before Daniel killed him. Still she could not stop seeing Ares’ angry face above her. “Yet you did hurt me. I tried to make it stop, I told Mother, and you hit me, you threw me across the temple as if I were no more than a sack of rice. You did it all for the love of a woman who never wanted me.”

“I was angry, that is true.” Ares groped for the words which would soothe her heart but could not find them. “I am so sorry, Callestah. I didn’t know, I didn’t understand. I thought you were lying that you were making up stories. You were always such a precocious and imaginative child.  You are right; I never should have taken you to Kanan. I didn’t know,” his voice was soft and beseeching as he looked up at her face. It was blank and distant as an unceasing river of tears ran forth from her emerald eyes.

 “I hurt, I was scared. Then she was dead and you…so much angrier…I never meant to take your Love from you. I never meant to hurt you so. Oxi, parakalo. Siynomi, Pateras .”

“Of course I forgive you.” Ares said soothing her brow. “You did nothing wrong.”

“Kathika.”

“Lost? No, you are finally found.” He asked worried by her use of the Greek language. Even when she was little she spoke English. Why? Because Duncan MacLeod spoke English and she was highly smitten with the Highlander.  Maeve taught her Gaelic and MacLeod taught her English.  It wasn’t until she was close to six that Callestah even heard Greek, her native language spoken. She tried hard to learn if for no other reason than to make her Father proud but she always struggled with it.  Her hand dropped from his and the blankness in those eyes became even more pronounced.  Madness lingered back there it stared him in the face and laughed.  Like all of his Sons—all of is failed offspring—her mind was weak.  Callestah turned and Ares’ heart stopped as she began walking away. “Pou pas, Callestah?” (Where are you going?) His concern and worry for her grew as she continued turning away.  This must be how Jackson felt when Calla suddenly started speaking Shankuk to him. How it must strike fear in Jackson’s heart when she started reverting backward because it was too difficult to go forward.

“Pigeno gia…Pigeno gia…” (I am going…I am going…) “Den xero.” Callestah shook her head slowly from side to side. Ares tried to catch her eye to get her attention but it eluded him. “Vo-eeth-ia?” (Will you help me?)

“Ne. Ne.” (Yes. Yes.)

“Kako.” (I am bad)

“Ohi. Kalo.” (No, you are good.) “Se the-lo. Sa-aga-po.” (I want you. I love you.)

“Den Katalaveno.” (I don’t understand.)

“Fee-li se me.” (Kiss me.)

His lips were full and moist as her eyes focused on them but there was something else there.  “You’re bleeding, Father.”

“No matter.” Ares said with a sad smile glad to hear English coming from her lips again. She truly murdered the Greek language—even worse than most tourists!—when she tried to speak it.  More than that her return to English meant she was leaving the past and coming back to the present.  Perhaps that might mean she was looking forward to a future…with him.  Here lied the crux of her biggest problem.  Father.  Tonight she was on the threshold of turning in that relationship with him for another, more intimate one and it frightened her more than he ever imagined it would.  “After tonight you will be Wife first and Daughter second, if the Gods are kind to us then soon you will be Wife, Mother and Daughter.  Understand? Let go of your fear.  It will be all right, I swear.”

“You left me.”

Ares reached up to wipe the tears from her pale cheeks. “I have done many horrible things in my life and I have made many people suffer but none more than you, my precious Little One.” He sighed.  “Never have I made a more unforgivable mistake. I need you to know that when I returned through the Stargate with you screams still echoing in my mind, Eros was there. He was waiting for me and the instant I saw his face I knew! I knew what he’d done. What I had done to you. I wanted to turn around and go back for you right then, I wanted to charge through that damn Gate, grab you up in my arms and beg your forgiveness.”

“Why didn’t you? Why did you leave me so long? If you knew….why….”

“Eros had the Chains of Hephastus with him.” Ares explained quietly. We fought and he slapped them on me and I couldn’t tell him where you were, not knowing what he’d done.  He held me for days trying to make me tell him where I had taken you when he finally realized I was not going to break he vowed to find you himself.  Soon after that those ugly Gesh’Tah came in their ship and they took me away left me to rot on that planet where O’Neill and the others eventually found me.  Should I have told your brother where you were to save you from Kanan? Or do you believe that Eros would have been no Master than he was?”  Caressing the outline of her sorrowful face he added. “You have always been my salvation, my redemption.  Say you believe me, I am down on my knees and I beg you to forgive me. Please, my beautiful gracious Lady, don’t turn me away. Grant me this and I will spend Eternity making this up to you.”

“I don’t know what to do.”

On his knees before her looking up into her beautifully worn face it seemed to him that the last of her strength left her as she began to pitch forward Ares stood up catching her and lifting her off her feet taking her up into his big protective arms as he went. “I do.” He carried her back inside and to the bed.

End Chapter Three Of True Colors: Ares & Callestah A Love Story
By Moon Mistress
Continue to
Chapter Four